Harbouring a hatred for someone for a long time is not easy afterall.

Everyday on my way to work in the car, and on my way back to work on the train, i've never failed to do one think. Think & Soul-searching. I've been doing this for the past one week or two. Suddenly, it happened to hit me recently that actually, the hatred has vanished and disappeared into thin air. The hate entry for that someone was probably written in a fit of anger, angst and so much bitterness.

Today, whilst day-dreaming in the office, it suddenly dawned on me that, hey, actually we could still be friends, rather than hate him, and waste one friendship. But i really don't know if he'll think likewise. Oh well.. I find it so hard to hate someone. Hating someone for eternity seems like a remotely possible task to me. As i've said in the previous post, that i've never really hated anyone. And even if i do, the hatred doesn't last forever. Well, i guess to hate someone, who once meant the whole world to me was no easy feat.Whether its 1 month later, or 1 year later, i'm very certain i will still have a soft spot for him. Bah. What a damn softie i am. How could i turn my back against him overnight. I can understand if hatred gradually builds up, but really, that hatred which i've mentioned earlier, came to me as an eruption from a dormant vocalno. It was when i least expected, it was when he turned his back on me out of the blue. The shock was too sudden that i couldn't grapple with it. I couldn't think through clearly, and i thought hating would be the easy way out. I was wrong.I guess hating is really not in my league. Not only do i not feel like myself, but i feel that i've disappointed my parents. From young, i was taught to bury the hatchet, and not harbour any grudges. I was thought to forgive in school and in church. I don't know what the other party is thinking, but at least i know i've thought through things clearly. If he hates me, for i don't know what, then...too bad for me i guess.

On a lighter note, my parents are always in the way of my diet plans. They always pick the wrong thing to eat at the wrong time and wrong place. Today, dinner was at Simpang. Yuck. Oh how i hate the gee in the prata and lard, and what not. What the hell am i suppose to eat from there when everything is laden in oil and oil and more oil and carbo. The raw cucumber and onions from the satay? Urgh. And it didn't help how i went for a high-tea on Sunday. I just hope they don't eat anything too rich on Father's Day.

I missed jogging today, you know what, i'm gonna do some push-ups and crunches now. The punching bag and excercise ball are on their way! Woo.

"Wish i could be every little thing you wanted, all the time"
-Dishwalla