The Bus Interchange That Stirs A Myriad Of Emotions

This has got to be Pasir Ris Bus Interchange. Many NSF could attest to that, while others might not agree, that is if army life was a complete blast to them. That place is where friendships between bunkmates are forged, relationship between girlfriends are brutally damaged, couples breaking up, couple becoming stronger. The list goes on..

Usually, i won't even be passing by there in the evening. But because of work, i had to rush down to Pasir Ris to give tution as soon as i knock off. I didn't expect so many army men to be there, especially its a Thursday. Baldies booking out, happy parents, very excited gfs waiting for their bfs etc etc. I remember being one of them there.

Then i go a little emotional whilst waiting for the bus. Looking at the baldies (what i used to call him) reminded me of so many things. It was like, 2003 was only 2 mths ago. 23 Jan 2003, the day of his enlistment. I remembered that was the day i was supposed to catch Avril's Concert in the evening at Suntec Convention Hall. For some reasons, i guess i really wanted to see him one last time, i acted non-chalant about not seeing him off, but i being that stupid weak softie, i still ended up going to Pasir Ris, still remember with a tennis racket in my hand. We didn't meet for long, cuz he was at the food court with his mom, then later, he called me to buy him a marker. So i went into a shop, got him a red marker. Since that was what they have. Only to have him yelled at me for buying a red marker when i met him, when he didnt' even specify what colour he wanted. I was a little peeved and upset. The goodbye was just so rubbish and unpleasant.

From there, i waited for Bus No. 12, cuz i was going to Neha's house first. Then i saw a glimpse of him and his mom walking towards the Tekong Bus. That was the first time i saw his mom from afar. Whatever it is, i just didn't want to take a second glance, cuz i was too annoyed. On the bus, i teared, as much as i tried to hold back the tears. I don't know if its because i was sad that he's leaving, or was it because of the red marker incident. Maybe a bit of both. Thoughts ran through my mind. Like if ever i get together with him (we weren't together then), will he treat me like this? Will he take me for granted and not appreciate things which i do for him. I really should've seen it coming.

I miss the good old times where we would walk ard at White Sands before he books in. Stocking up on Mentos Strong Mint(3 in a pack) was a weekly routine. I even rem the first strangest thing he gave me, this pellet, or dont know what lah. Its this black thing. And he said i have to keep it properly and not show anyone, cuz he sneaked that out. And that pellet thing is still resting on my shelf.

I look foward to every weekend, cuz thats when he used to book out. We would catch countless midnight movies all the time, probably to make up for the time lost. Every night after 930, i would anticipate that phonecall. Without fail, we would talk, and its no wonder how his phone bills escalated rocket high. Depressed as he may sound, i tried so hard to really be there for him, like assuring him that i'm still around no matter what. But i guess i wasn't good enough, cuz he told me, i can never understand what he's going through. Well, the same for my Freshmen Stint in NUS, he won't understand what i had to go through, not till 10th Aug. Those days were simply horrifying. I dreaded going to school, and i even cried because of school. Sigh. I'm glad those days were over for me.

We were best buddies then. Maybe something more than platonic buddies. Strange isn't it. I was actually happy the way we were as buddies, cuz i don't really expect us to be together. And, of course i'm very apprehensive about taking our friendship to the next level because i feel that i could only be his gf during his NS stint. I should've gone with my gut feeling. I was right about it. Look what has happened now. All the times i wish he could ORD faster, just so that we could spend more time together has gone just like that. All the activities i've planned, picnic, cooking, baking, holiday, bowling, movies everyday, just washed away like that. I always wish we got together in JC, but no, he had to be that indecisive tearjerker. I kinda gave up on him after my JC2 prelims, cuz he was one of the factors that contributed to my magnificent grade of D E O.

There was time constraint when he was in the army. Back when he was tekong, he had to stay in for remedial training, cuz he always fails the broadjump. After tekong everything was about 2359 and guard duty, and sweep, water parade at 9 and get response checks and confinements in camp because he missed the broadjump by 3-5cm for his IPPT, and failed to get Silver. There hardly was time for us to be together. Even if there was, he would be so lethargic, or like he needed time for himself and his friends. Its so hard to keep a relationship when a guy is in the army. How did i do that? And the day (ORD LOH!!) when he finally has time, he has a change in heart. The timing couldn't be any apt. Is this some sort of game that God has planned? Well, probably. Cuz for us to be together during his army stint was probably a miracle that God has created too. Who would've thought we could be together when he was still in the army. I guess everyone was taken by surprise.
Its a pity that we drifted probably because of time.


Despite all that, 2003 was still the best year in my life.